[Scene. Mr. HARGRAVE'S House in the Country.]
The Runaway
Act I
Scene 1
[A Garden. Enter BELLA, HARRIET, and GEORGE Hargrave].
George
Oh, for the Luxury of dressing-gown and slippers!—the
roads are so dusty, and the sun so hot—'twould be less
intolerable riding Post in Africa.
Bella
What a wild imagination! But, by what mishap are you alone?
What have you done with all the College youths?—This is
the first Vacation you ever came home unaccompanied; I assure
you Sir we are quite disappointed.
Geo.
Most unconscionable creature! Never to be satisfied with
Conquest. There's poor Lumley shot through by your merciless
eyes.
Bella
A notable victory indeed! However, his name serves to add a
Unit to the list of one's conquests, and so you may give him
hope enough just to feed his sighs—but not to encourage
his presumption.
Geo.
Paragon of Generosity! And what portion of comfort will you
in mercy bestow on Egerton and Filmer, who still hug the
chains of the resistless Arabella!
Bella
Upon my word, your Catalogue grows interesting—'tis
worth while now to enquire for your Vouchers—Proofs,
George, proofs!
Geo.
Why, the first writes sonnets in your praise, and the last
toasts you till he cannot see.
Bella
Oh, most surprising fortune! The Dulcinea of one; and to the
other a CIRCE—transforming him into a beast. I hope you
have better love-tokens for the blushing Harriet—How
does——[looking at Harriet].
Harriet
Fie Bella—you use me ill!
Geo.
Why sister! you plead guilty before the Charge is finished.
But tell me, my sweet Harriet, who is the favoured mortal of
whom you wish to hear?
Har.
Indeed, Brother, I have no enquiry to make;—but, I
imagine my Cousin can inform you whom she meant.
Bella
Oh, doubtless, I could make the enquiry for you; but you look
so offended Harriet, that I dare not venture—ask for Sir
Charles Seymour yourself.
Geo.
Seymour! [Aside.]—Oh, oh! very confidential is my
friend Sir Charles, truly; and this then is the object of his
intended Visit!—If Seymour be the man, my sister set
your heart at rest; he is not very distant from
marriage—if I am not mistaken—with a fine blooming
girl; [looking at Harriet] not more than
nineteen—soft dove-like eyes—pouting
lips—teeth that rival, doubtless, oriental pearl—a
Neck—I want a Simile now—ivory, wax,
alabaster—no! they wont do.
Har.
[With an air of Pique] One would imagine, Brother, you
were drawing the picture of your own Mistress, instead of Sir
Charles's, your colours are so vivid.
Geo.
A fine woman, Harriet, gives animation to all around her:
she is that Universal Spirit about which Philosophers talk,
the Attraction that binds the system of Society.
Bella
Heydey, George! Did the charms of Lady Dinah inspire this
rhapsody!
Geo.
Charms! What, of that antiquated, gaudy, sententious,
philosophic Lady, who blessed us with her long Speeches at
dinner?
Bel.
You must learn to be more respectful in your Epithets, Sir,
for that antiquated, sententious, philosophic Lady designs
you the honour, we suspect, of becoming your Mother!
Geo.
My Mother! Heaven forfend—you jest, surely!
Bel.
You shall judge.—We met her in our late visit to
Bath.She renewed her acquaintance with your Father, with whom
she had been intimate in Mrs. Hargrave s life time. He
invited her to return with us, and she has been here this
month. They are, frequently, closeted together. She has forty
thousand pounds, and is Sister to an Irish Peer.
Geo.
She might have been Grandmother to a Peer, by the years
she has numbered. But, her excessive Stateliness and Decorum
overcame me;—how can they agree with my father's
vociferation, october, and hounds!
Bel.
Oh, I assure you, wonderously well—she kisses
Jowler, takes Ringwood on her lap, and, as for the october,
she has more than once sipped out of your Father's tankard.
Obstructing Delicacies are easily made to give way, when
Schemes are formed in the minds of her stamp.
Geo.
My pretty Coquette Cousin Bella, take care to avoid that
state in which your delicacy may give way! when you
may rise from the labours of your toilette with no end in
view but the conquest of—some Quixote Galant in his
grand climacteric, on whom you ll squander more encouraging
glances, than all the sighs and ardor of two-and-twenty can
extort from you now.
Bel.
Memento mori! Quite a College compliment! you ought
rather to admit that my power will encrease, until, like Ninon,
I sway more peremptorily at Eighty than at Eighteen. But,
here's John coming, to summon us to Coffee.—Harriet!
Geo.
Come, Harriet—why that pensive air? give me your hand.
Har.
I'll only step and look at my birds, and follow you
instantly.—[Exeunt GEORGE and BELLA playfully]
Set your heart at rest, my Sister!—Oh Brother, you have
robbed that heart of rest for ever. Cruel Intelligence!
Perfidious Seymour! Yet, of what can I accuse him? He never
professed to love me. Yes! his ardent looks, his sighs, his
confusion, his respectful attentions, have a thousand times
professed the strongest passion. Oh! a man cannot in honour
be exculpated, who, though the word Love never pass his lips,
by such methods defrauds a woman of her heart! [Exit.]
Scene 2
[A Garden Parlour. Enter George and Bella, at the Garden Door. Bella seating herself at a Tea Table.]
Bel.
Hang this Lady Dinah—one's forced to be so dressed, and so formal! In
the Country we should be all Shepherds and Shepherdesses;—Meadows, Ditches,
and Rooks, make a strange combination with Court Manners!
Geo.
Hist—she's in the Hall I see; I ll go and squire her
in. [Exit, and returns with Lady Dinah.]
Lady D.
To you, Sir, who have been so long conversant with the
classic manners of the Antients, the frivolous custom of
Tea-drinking must appear ridiculous!
Geo.
No Custom can be ridiculous, Lady Dinah, that gives us the
society of the Ladies. The state of the young men of those
days excites pity; they never partook of such elegant hours.
Lady D.[aside]
He is all that his Father described!
[Enter Mr Hargrave.]
Mr. H.
No; Barbary Bess is spavin'd, let her be taken care of; I'll
have Longshanks, and see that he is saddled by five. So, we
shan't have you in the Hunt tomorrow, George; you must have
more time to shake off the lazy rust of Cambridge, I
suppose.—What sort of hours d'ye keep at College?
Geo.
Oh, Sir, we are frequently up before the Sun, there.
Mr. H.
Aye, then it must be when you have not been in bed all night
I believe. And how do you stand in other matters? Have the
old ones tired you with their Greek, and their Geometry, and
their learned Experiments to shew what Materials air, and
fire, and water, are made of—eh?
Bella
Oh, Sir, he never studied them closely enough to be tired.
His philosophy and mine keep pretty equal pace, I believe.
Geo.
As usual, my lively Cousin! Why not say my Philosophy and
your Coquetry—that would have been a Compliment!
However, Sir, I am not tired of my Studies, though Bella has
not exactly hit the Reason.
Lady D. [to Mr. H.]
The Muses, Sir, sufficiently recompence the most painful
assiduities. Those indeed who court them like the Toasts of
the season, merely because it is the Fashion, are neither
alive to their beauties, nor penetrated with their charms.
But, these are faithless Knights;—your Son, I dare say,
has enlisted himself amongst their sincerest votaries.
Geo.
You do me great honour; and I have no doubt that with the
Muses you are familiarly acquainted. They shed their favours
on a few only, but those who obtain them must, like you, be
irresistible! [Aside. I'll catch her Ladyship's stile!]
Mr. H. [aside]
Humph—I'm glad he likes her.
Lady D.
You men are so full of Flattery! In Athens, in Lacedemon,
that vice was, for ages, unknown—it was then that the
Athenians were the happiest, and the Lacedemonians the
most—
Bel.
Oh mercy!—I have burnt my fingers in the most terrible
manner!
[Enter Harriet, from the Garden.]
Harriet
Dear Bella, I am quite concerned!
Bella [aside.]
Pho!—I only meant to break in upon her Harrangues;
there's no enduring so much Wisdom!
[Enter Servant.]
Serv.
Mr. Drummond.
[Enter Mr. Drummond.]
Mr. D.
Ah! my dear Godson!—why this is an unexpected pleasure.
I did not know you were arrived!
Geo.
I have had that happiness only a few hours, Sir, and was on
the point of doing homage to you at the Park.
Mr. D.
Ungracious Rogue! a few hours, and not been with me yet!
However—stay where you are—stay where you are,
George; you cannot come under my roof with Safety now, I
assure you; such a pair of eyes—such a bloom—such a
shape!—Ah Girls, Girls!
Harriet
Dear Mr. Drummond of what, or whom, are you speaking? You
make me quite jealous.
Mr. D.
Oh! you are all outdone, eclipsed—you have no chance
near my Incognita. Then she has the prettiest foot,
and moves—a Grace!
Bel.
Teasing Creature!
Mr. D.
Pretty Bella! well, it shall be satisfied, Mr. Hargrave, I
wait on you, Sir, to request a reception for a young Lady of
Beauty and Honour, who has put herself under my care. But, as
I really think my house a dangerous situation for her,
considering that I am single, young, and handsome [touching
his cheeks]—I cannot, in Conscience, subject her to
the risk!—You, being a grave, orderly, man, and having a
couple of decent, well- behaved young women for a Daughter
and Niece, I think she will be more certainly protected
here—And this is my business.
Mr. H.
A young Lady put herself under your care! Who is she?
Mr. D.
Her name she wishes to conceal.
Mr. H.
That's very odd! Where did you meet with her?
Mr. D.
At the house of a Widow Tenant of mine, where she had taken
Refuge from a marriage to which her Uncle would have forced
her. She had no companion but the good old Lady; whom I found
employed in assisting her to weep instead of consoling her.
In short, there were reasons for thinking her situation there
placed her within reach of Intrusion, and I prevailed on her
to leave it.
Mr. H.
Mr. D.
I dont remember that I was ever imposed on.
Mr. H.
No! dont I know how many people you have plagued yourself
about—who had not one grain of Merit?
Mr. D.
I want Merit, Mr. Hargrave; yet, all the blessings of Health
and Fortune have not been withheld from me.
Mr. H.
Aye, aye—there's no getting you to hear Reason on this
subject.
Mr. D.
'Tis too late to reason now. The young Lady is at my house, I
have promised to bring her hither, and we must endeavour to
raise the poor girl's Spirits. She would have spoiled the
prettiest face in England—I beg pardon Ladies—one
of the prettiest faces, with weeping at the old Widow's.
Bel.
An old Widow, a pretty Girl, a Lover, a tyrannical
Uncle!—'tis a charming group for the summer amusement of
a village circle. I long to see this Beauty.
Lady D.
Her mere Beauty, according to Mr. Drummond, may be
conspicuous enough—but, her Pretensions to BIRTH and
HONOUR seem to be a more doubtful matter.
Geo.
Pardon me, my Lady, why should we doubt of either? A Lady in
such a situation has a Right to protection; and I hope, Sir [to
his father] you will not withhold yours.
Mr. H.
Oh, no, to be sure, George.—Sbud! refuse reception to a
fine Girl! 'twould be, with you, a crying Sin, I warrant! But
Mr. Drummond, I should suppose—
Mr. D.
Come, you shall je satisfied. Though the weakness with which
you reproach me would have induced me to have snatched her
from an alarming situation without much Examination, yet, in
compliment to your Delicacy, I have made proper
enquiries;—she was placed under the care of Mrs. Carlton
by a person of character, and she has dispatched a Messenger
to her Uncle, who, I presume, will be here to-morrow.
Harriet [To Mr. H.]
Pray, Sir, permit us to wait on the Lady, and conduct her; I
am strongly interested for her.
Mr. H.
'Tis an odd affair.—What say you to it, My Lady?
Lady D.
As your family seems desirous to receive her, Sir, I am sorry
to perceive an Impropriety in the request. But I should
apprehend that any appearance of Encouragement to young
Ladies in disobedience—particularly when accompanied
with the glaring Indecorum of an Elopement—
Mr. H.
Aye, very true. Sbud, Mr. Drummond, how can you encourage
such—
Mr. D.
My Lady, I do not mean to encourage, but to restore the young
Lady to her family. she seems terrified at the peculiar
severity of her Uncle's temper; so, we'll put ourselves in
form, receive him in fully assembly, and divide his anger
amongst us. Your Ladyship, I'm sure, must be happy to render
the recovery from the first false step as easy as possible.
Mr. H.
Why, aye, my Lady, there can be no harm in that, you know.
Lady D.
Very well, Sir, if you think so, I can no longer perceive
Impropriety.
Mr. H.
Well then, Harriet, you may go I think.
Bella
And I with you, Cousin.
Mr. D.
Come then my pretty doves—I'll escort you.—George,
steel your heart, steel your heart! you Rogue.
Geo.
Oh, it is steeled, already, Sir. [Exit Mr. D with
Harriet and Bella]
Mr. H.
You need not go, George, I want to speak to you.
Lady D.
[aside.] Bless me! What does he intend to say, now? he is
going to open the affair to his Son—well—these are
the most anxious moments in a Woman's life—but, one must
go through with them. [to Mr. H. and Geo.] I
have Letters to write, which I'll take this leisure to do, if
you'll pardon my absence, Gentlemen.
Mr. H.
To be sure, my Lady. [both bowing. Exit Lady D.]
Well, George, how do you like that Lady?
Geo.
Inexpressibly, Sir.—I never saw a Lady so learned!
Mr. H.
Oh, she's clever—she's an Earl's Sister too, and a forty
thousand pounder! boy.
Geo.
That's a fine fortune.
Mr. H.
Aye, very fine, very fine—and then her Interest! suppose
I could prevail with her—eh, George—if one could
keep her in the family, I say—would not that be a hit?
Geo.
An alliance with so noble a Family, Sir, is certainly
desirable.
[Enter Servant.]
Serv.
The Gentlemen are in the smoaking parlour, Sir.
Mr. H.
Very Well—are the pipes and october in readiness?
Serv.
Yes, Sir. [Exit.]
Mr. H.
Well then, we'll talk over the affair to-morrow. What, I
suppose your stomach is too squeamish for Tobacco and strong
beer? You'll find the Justice, and some more of your old
friends, there.
Geo.
Pardon me, Sir, I made too free with the bottle at Dinner. I
believe a turn in the Garden in a better recipe than tobacco
fumes.
Mr. H.
Well, well, we wont dispute the matter with you now,
boy—but, you know, I dont like Milksops.
Geo. [smiling]
Nor I Sir. [Exit.]
Mr. H.
Aye, aye, George is a brave boy; he is not of the set of
whipsters who, affecting to despise the jolly manners of
their Ancestors, only show us—how greatly manners may be
altered without being mended! [Enter Justice.]
It is at least doubtful whether we are a bit wise, happier,
or greater, than we were in good old Bess's days, when the
men of Rank were robust, and the women of Fashion buxom.
Justice.
Aye, aye, I wish the innovations of Pretty Fellows and
Puny Girls were antiquated. A rosy buxom lass, with
eyes that sparkle like the glasses we toast her in—adad,
I'd drink her health till the earth went gaily round under
me.—But, what a plague, Squire, d'ye stay here
for?—come and make your Speeches in t'other room; we can
drink in the mean time—and there'll be no time lost.
Mr. H.
Well, well, I'll go; but, I want to consult you;—I have
been thinking whether this Greenwood estate—
Jus.
Tush, you know, very well, that I can neither consider or
advise, 'till I have had my brace. I am as dark,'till the
liquor sends its Fires into my brains, as a lanthorn without
its candle; so, if you've any obscure point to be examined,
keep it until I'm enlightened.
Mr. H.
Well, come along. [Going.]
[Enter Clerk.]
Clerk.
The people from the Crown, your Worship, and the Rose, and
the Antelope, are here, again, about their Licences.
Jus. [to Mr. H.]
There! this is what I've got by coming for you. I charged
the Butler not to let this dog in.—Why how can I help
it? bid 'em come again to-morrow.
Clerk.
And here's a Pauper to be passed, a lame man with four
children.
Mr. H.
Well, turn him over to the Cook, and let him wait 'till we
are at leisure;—he'll be better off than in the world
at large.
Clerk.
And a Constable has brought up a man for breaking into Farmer
Thompson's barn last night.
Jus.
Has he? [seeming irresolute] Well, tell him to wait
too—we are going to be busy now. But, I hope he wont let
the prisoner escape, as he did that dog Farlow.
Clerk.
I wish he mayn't. But, Sir, Justice Manly is now in the
smoaking-room. I have spoke to him about the
Licences—and we mayn't have another bench
this——
Jus.
Will you please to march, Sir? [Exit Clerk.]
Mr. H.
Well done, old Boy! Burn himself could not have dispatched
business with more Expedition. [Going.]
[Enter Clerk.]
Clerk.
The Miller is here, Sir, with a man that he catched with a
Hare that he had taken in a Springe; but, the poor fellow,
please your Worship, has a large Family! [Hargrave andJustice
return.]
Mr. H.
What!—a Hare! Come along Justice! [Exit with the
Clerk.]
[ A burst of laughter from the smoaking Room, on the opposite side; the Justice looks wistfully back, and then follows Mr. Hargrave.]
Scene 3
[The Garden. Enter George, reading.]
Geo.
Here's a special fellow of a Philosopher, now, would persuade
that Pleasure has no existence, when nature abounds with it,
courting the senses in a thousand varied modes; reigning, in
the Understanding, in the faculty of Reason, and seizing the
Heart—in the form of beauteous, all subduing, Woman! And
one there is—Memory! be faithful to her charms; shew me
the beauteous Form—the Mind beaming in her eyes—the
Blush and Smile that repaid my Admiration—
[Enter Bella]
Bel.
Oh! monstrous—George Hargrave soliloquizing in the
Garden, whilst the finest girl in England is in the Parlour!
What is become of your Gallantry?
Geo.
Gone, sweet Cousin, gone.
Bel.
Indeed! Who has robbed you of it?
Geo.
A Woman.
Bel.
Come then and regain it from—such a Woman!
Geo.
Is she so beautiful?
Bel.
Beautiful! look at me—I myself am not so handsome.
Geo.
Ha! ha! ha!—that I confess is an infallible proof. But,
I'll bet this whole Volume of Wisdom against one of your
Billet-doux,
that she's not within fifty degrees of her who witched my
heart away.
Bel.
Witched indeed, if, in six weeks, it has not made one Excursion. I never knew
you so constant before; however, I prophecy her Charm is broke. The
divinity who will reign—perhaps for another six weeks—is coming
down the steps with Harriet. But, that her Rays may not dazzle your mortal
sight at once, shelter yourself behind the clump, and examine her through
the Leaves. [George goes and returns.] Well, how d'ye like her?
Geo.
Like her !—The air is all Ambrosia—every happy star
has lent its influence, and, led surely by the Plant, Venus,
they have guided the event.
Bel.
Hey dey ! what event? This cannot be your Masquerade Lady!
Geo.
It is, it is—the sweet thief herself! She is my
Wood-Nymph—Oh, I am transported!
Bel.
And I amazed. How can it be?
Geo.
No matter how, whether by Chance or Witchcraft;—how
could my thoughts be gadding now amongst the
Stars!—Pshaw—away—and, at her feet indulge
these transports! [Going.]
Mr D.
So, so, so! and pray what's the Cause of all these
transports?
Geo.
You are the cause—'tis to you my dear Mr. Drummond that
I am indebted for the happiness which dawns on me.
Mr. D.
Then, God grant, my dear boy, the dawn may not deceive
thee—but brighten into the fairest day. But, how have I
been instrumental in all this?
Geo.
That Lady I have seen before at a Masquerade—she
possessed herself of my heart but once—but, I despaired
of ever beholding her again—come, and present me!
[Going.]
Mr. D.
Hold, George, hold; perhaps you had better never be
presented; for, though you may have put her in possession of
your heart, it by no means follows that she has had a
corresponding complaisance for you. Suppose, for instance,
such a trifle—as her's being engaged?
Bel.
Oh unconscionable! to fancy the o'erbounding Imagination of a man in Love
can pause over such a reasonable supposition—But, pray George
postpone your entrée till you are more composed; I'll go and
prepare her for the reception of a strange creature, that you may appear to
advantage. [Exit.]
Geo.
Oh I will hope every advantage from so fortunate a Chance;
her heart cannot—shall not—be engaged;—and she
shall be mine! Pardon, my dear Sir, the effusions of
my Joy!
Mr. D..
I do pardon them. 'Tis a strange rencontre; are you
acquainted with the Lady's Name?
Geo.
No one knew her—She seemed like an angel descended to
astonish each beholder, and vanish the moment she had fixed
his adoration. Unluckily Mrs. Medlar stopped me, and a
jealous Coxcomb, in the suiteof my Incognita,
seized that moment to hurry her out of the room.
Mr. D.
Your ignorance perhaps I can relieve; but, you seem so
disposed to Raptures, that I hardly dare tell you that I know
something of her family. Perhaps I should not otherwise have
been so ready to put her in your way.
Geo.
I am convinced you know nothing that will not justify my
Passion!
Mr. D.
This eagerness to believe, might have been fatal to you. But,
you are fortunate; she is the daughter of a deceased Major
Morley, a man to whose friendship, and elegance of Manners, I
was indebted for happy and rational hours amidst the bustle
of a Camp.
Geo.
Fortunate indeed! for then my passion has your sanction.
But, I thought that, when you received her, you had not known
who—
Mr. D.
I knew her Father's picture on her bosom. But, her delicacy
was so alarmed at the idea of exposing the Name of her
family, in such a situation, that she would not consent to be
introduced here, but on condition of its being concealed.
Geo.
Charming delicacy! I'll keep her secret—but—
Mr. D.
Impatient Rogue! Well, come, I'll introduce you, and may the
moment be auspicious! [Exit.]
Geo.
[following him] Love! sweet Tyrant! I willingly submit
to thee——never may I experience the cheerless void of Indifference
again! [Exit.]
END OF ACT I
